Mega Me : Mega Monster Enduro 2012

 (photos - Bill Bushnell)

20% chance of rain for the Bay Area led me to leave my cozy home at 6:30am for the 2012 Mega Monster Enduro.  Who knew that the rain would only fall in, you guessed it, Paicines last Saturday.

My chauffeur bailed on me so I drove myself to the event except that I didn't have enough gas and had to stop in Morgan Hill.  I said to the attendant:  Fill me up.  I had the distinct impression that he wanted to pump my gas alrighty....

There I am at Bittersweet, the turnaround for the 100K riders.  And my entourage waiting to escort me back.  Seeing welcoming faces helped a lot to deal with the inclement weather.  Howard, Dan, Lisa, Andrea, the dynamic duo of Tim and Clark, Lane Parker, Bill Bushnell (unable to ride but out there taking photos) and our main man from the East Coast, Mr. Kevin W.

Occasionally there were glimpses of sun and breaks in the inclement weather but it certainly was a challenge to do the 64 miles in mostly spitting rain.  I admire the cyclists who did the full 102 course.  Of course the farmer who wanted to take me on a spin on the tractor helped, too.  I bet he knows how to plough a field nicely....  Oh and whoever made those delicious brownies served at the end, and thank you Lane Parker for the food at the Bittersweet rest stop. 

My motto for the ride:  Suck it Up.  Suck it Up.  And that I did.  Along with a very nice sentiment from Kevin who replied, after I asked, "Where was the sun, Mister?,"  -- "It's in your heart," he said.

How'd I do compared to 2010?  Well I took 13 minutes off this time.  I attribute this to virtually no wind and the desire to get the hell out of Paicines. 

Just the Stats:

64 miles

5 hr

12.5 mph avg

28 mph descent

The Return of the Mega Monster Enduro

I want to rock and roll all night and party every day (Kiss) but to do so and to remain a sex kitten (don't tell anyone but I'm now 46), I need to get on the bike now and then. So, this morning, I set off to meet my fellow cyclists in Paicines for the Mega Monster Enduro ride.





Dazzling green rolling hills but before we start --- the drive down Hwy 101 was blanketed in dense fog. I missed the exit for CA 25 Hollister and as I drove down the highway, I briefly contemplated going to Mexico or maybe Santa Barbara. I eventually landed in the vicinity and was thrilled to hug our Grand Marshall Kevin who flew all the way from the East Coast to spearhead this event. Off my little tushy went with little fanfare not knowing how I'd do on the 100k ride. It's a deceptive ride, full of climbs, rollers, flats, and sometimes a lot of wind.

I was assigned the number 21. Which reminds me.... Yesterday, a male student got in the elevator with me. He said, "I thought we were going up." Me with a wicked smile on my sticky lips replied, "We're going down, Mister." And the doors closed..... The Boyfriend is shaking his head. Focus focus on the biking he says.






Have no idea who he is but I asked if I could take him home with me. The Boyfriend is shaking his head and saying focus woman, focus on the frigging biking. Okey dokey, The BF got 2 flats in the first 25 miles and I witnessed other boys getting flats. Me, no way Jose, not with my tank tires. Hee hee.






On and on and on. More scenery to give you an idea of the ride. Sad thing is that the divine Ms. M and her troopers along with Mr. Bill passed me on the way going out and they passed me on the way going back. Sigh, because they did the 100 mile. Hey, despite being all over the place with my speed, I felt that I did a good job being that I have not done 64 miles since Levi's Grand Fondo back in October. And we've had a lot of rain to hamper our outings.

Lots of cows out in their pasture. I sang to them. I am amazed that a stampede did not ensue.





What's a bike ride without a helicopter scene? Poll out about Valentine's Day. Clearly, I'm not focusing on the biking.... Who would you rather spend VDay with -- your lover or your pet? Her name is Charlotte and she has the most adorable pink nose. Years ago, she and her sister (who has passed way) would bring me dead insects, you know, dump them at my feet. Ah, true love.

Just the stats, Ma'am. Less wind than 2008 but still quite the outing!

64 miles
29 mph fastest speed on a descent
12.2 mph avg
5 hr 13 min

Monster Bash

Early Saturday morning, as in it was still dark and I should have been in bed, I found myself being driven by The Boyfriend to Paicines for the 2008 Mega Monster Enduro Ride, a spin off of the Low Key Hillclimbs.

I dressed as though on an expedition in Siberia while the other beauty contestants wore bikinis and swim trunks (oh alrighty, slight exaggeration). At the start, as I prepared to shoot off, Dan the Man, said to me, "No drafting." That's code for no flirting. No! There goes the day I thought. I could have stayed home, slept in, and gone to see The Hottie and the Naughty starring Paris Hilton.

The ride was an out and back on CA25, a road of rolling hills with little traffic, a few ranches, some wineries and the Pinnacles looming in the distance. I chose the 100K having not been on the Bed (aka Bianchi Eros Donna) since 6 weeks ago and having not done 65 miles since August. I am a poster child for "Just do it" though I had to revise my strategy of Start Flirt Finish. The Boyfriend opted for the 100 mile and he soon shot past me. Okay, many cyclists shot past me.

Ah, the scenery. Cows soaking up the warm air and sunshine. A fake monkey atop someone's mail box. A soothing ride. And of course the riders. Apparently, yellow is the new black for male cyclists. Quite a few of them, including The Boyfriend, in yellow jerseys. I met some nice women on the ride.

I managed to finish thanks to Fatboy Slim's Rockafeller Skank and the Ink Spots' Street of Dreams playing on my iPod to motivate me for those last few miles along with Greg who did the 100 mile and started much later than me and who passed me at the end, making me pick up some speed to finish. Embarrassing, eh. I suspect a lot of cyclists felt some burn towards the end. Results have not been posted. I'm hoping that I did not finish last but given my track record....

A big thank you to Kevin, Pat and others involved in making this event happen. While it might have been a low key kind of thing, it certainly was hi tech to have an antenna at the rest stop so that the guys could stay in contact. You all are just too cool. See you during the coming biking season.